Feeling whole again or the art of inner peace

And suddenly, there was this moment when I was completely at peace with myself, just sitting there on the porch of my beach hut on this small tropical island in Malaysia.

How on earth did that happen?

I used to be a person with a really busy inner critic working overtime. I used to struggle with negative thoughts about my body and my role as a woman. I lacked self-love and felt disconnected from my true self. I played a role dictated by my conditioned mind.

To understand how self-discovery works and to gain insights, I like to reflect on my life and my state of personal growth.

When I look back at past years, I see that my inner peace and this feeling of wholeness happened naturally while I had been spending time with things that brought me joy.

My outer journey turned into an inner journey simply by being in the moment and feeling the joy of being. This joy emanated from within me, from consciousness itself, by accepting the present moment as it was.

I surrendered to the present moment and listened to my heart’s desires. What made me truly happy? And I did more of that, over and over again. I created space in my life for the things that mattered most to me.

The joy of being means to feel who I truly am beyond the mental image I have of myself:

“You can only feel it when you get out of your head. Being must be felt. It can’t be thought.”

Eckhart Tolle

While I was busy with doing things that let my heart sing a shift happened, a shift from identification with the external appearance of my body to this feeling or knowing who I was on the inside.

In the beginning, I only got a glimpse of my true self, but I fell in love with what I saw. It felt good. I felt whole. I felt calm. I felt joyful. My motivation grew to have more of these moments where I could feel this inner peace. And I continued to do things that lit me up.

I connected with my inner self by feeling the joy of being. I realised that it wasn’t enough to just think that I was worthy and whole, that I had to feel it in my body.

I found love and compassion for myself and peace within by understanding that I had been whole all along underneath these layers of self-judgements. My true self-worth was not diminished by my limiting beliefs.

There’s no shortcut to inner peace. I have to walk the whole way motivating myself again and again. I could get easily distracted by everyday life and tasks I have to fulfil but I know the reward of self-care and nurturing my personal growth. That’s why I keep going and my spiritual practices are growing stronger and stronger.

I stand up for myself and admit that hustling day in, day out doesn’t serve me. I take time for myself, to reflect and to go within. Daily meditation helps to get in touch with my true self by just being and finding stillness within. By connecting with my inner self and the wisdom of my soul I can step into the healing space where I am whole and at peace.

“If the sufferer could look at her body without the interfering judgments of her mind or even recognize those judgments for what they are instead of believing in them – or better still, if she could feel her body from within – this would initiate her healing.”

Eckhart Tolle

When I read this sentence in the book “A New Earth” I immediately thought of Reiki. Receiving Reiki makes me feel my body from within. I can feel the life force energy flowing within and through me. I am calm and relaxed. I experience inner peace. I feel connected. I know who I am. I am pure consciousness. I have infinite possibilities that are not limited by my mind. I am whole. I am enough.

“Although you appear in earthly form, your essence is pure consciousness. You are the fearless guardian of divine light.”


This sense of wholeness and inner peace that I experience while meditating, doing things that light me up, or practising Reiki is being poured slowly into all the other parts of my life.

When I know who I truly am and love myself unconditionally nothing in the outer world can shake me.

When I remember my divine nature I am at peace, because I can feel that I am connected with the Divine Consciousness. I experience oneness by tapping into my inner world, my divine self.

Inner body awareness helps to restore health because true healing comes from within. Our bodies have the ability to heal themselves when we are in a relaxed, calm, and meditative state. Our truth and our soul’s wisdom lie within us and we know what to do in order to heal, to feel whole again and to experience inner peace. We just have to listen.


Ines Kirste

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